The Ten Worst Songs of 2012: What NOT to Expect

So, you’ve watched “The Ten Worst Songs of 2012” and you took it far too seriously, and now you want to know why certain songs aren’t on the list. That’s why you’re here right? Well then, hopefully the answer you’re looking for is here.

 

Psy – Gangnam Style

To be honest, I don’t know if the lyrics to “Gangnam Style” are stupid, because I don’t understand Korean. If you look at the Korean to English translations, they seem a little odd, but literal translations from most languages to other languages don’t make any sense. I can only imagine what a song like “Black & Yellow” translates to in Korean, and how little sense it makes to Koreans (not that it makes a ton of sense here either). Including foreign songs just leaves me open to three things:

1. Being called a racist (though I’m used to it, because people are morons and don’t know what that word means)

2. Being told I don’t understand what the fuck I’m talking about (and in this case, they’d potentially be right, my knowledge of Koreans is that they’re crazy about Starcraft and films about brutal revenge, that’s pretty much it)

3. Being criticized for not talking about other foreign songs (and rightfully so, the second I include one K-Pop song, I guess I need to review them all, as well as J-Pop songs, songs from Europe, Africa, South America, Latin America… and I have no intentions of doing that)

Gangnam Style isn’t hated because of any of the lyrics (because no one knows what he’s saying) or the music (it’s pretty standard pop/dance stuff), it’s hated because it was a viral video that became very overplayed everywhere. If you had to hear the same Mozart song 6 times a day, 7 days a week, for 3 months, you’d be pretty fucking sick of it too. Actual Koreans and people that are into K-Pop tell me that the song is making fun of “swag” and people pretending to act rich, ripping on people that think they’re better than others when they are clearly fakes. Seems like a pretty good message to me.

 

Double Take – Hot Problems, Nicole Westbrook – It’s Thanksgiving, or any other “viral” sensation.

The full title of my video should really be “The Ten Worst Songs of 2012 That Were Made by Professional Recording Artists and That Charted on Billboard”, but that’s too long, and should be implied anyway. I mentioned in last year’s “what not to expect” post, when I omitted Rebecca Black’s “Friday” that I won’t ever include viral videos made by some nobody that became famous. If I included even one of these songs, that means my list really should be just me cutting up a bunch of amateurs on YouTube… wannabe rappers, emo garage bands, girls who can’t sing covering pop artists… and I’d look like a bully, and the list wouldn’t be entertaining at all because no one would know who any of these people are. I also believe that no matter what, bad songs that have charted are automatically worse than anything else, because far more people are exposed to them and their shitty messages. Some kid horribly singing about Thanksgiving will never be worse than a song that gets airplay on MTV, radio stations across the country, in malls, at sporting events, and everywhere else, advocating whoring it up, drug use, and being an irresponsible piece of shit. YOLO though, right?

 

Any song I’ve already done a “Musical Autopsy” for

Last year this was a rule. This year, I broke the rule. Here’s the problem… in 2011, I did 4 musical autopsies, and one was of a song from 2010 that I had already included on that year’s list, so I only had to worry about 3 songs. Because the feature became so popular, I did more in 2012… 6 artists and I believe 7 qualifying songs were “autopsied”. So… there’s a little overlap (I won’t say which one(s) if you haven’t seen the video yet). Regardless, if it was in a Musical Autopsy, and it didn’t make the list, consider it a runner up.

 

Any song by Blood on the Dance Floor

Who the fuck are these guys? I get so many requests to talk about BOTDF, but here’s the problem: I have more subscribers than their official YouTube channel, and many of my videos have more views than a lot of their videos. Go ahead, see for yourself, their user name is “officialbotdf”. Is your local radio station (commercial radio, not college/campus radio) actually playing these guys? If so, their music director is an idiot. Not because they’re awful (I have no idea what they sound like, I’ve honestly never heard a song by them, and I never will unless it happens organically, if they actually have a hit), but because they are nobody. Radio survives by playing hits, by pandering to the masses. If a music director put them in rotation, they’re basically saying “change the channel”. The idea behind every element on the radio, every song, every time the DJ comes on air, is to try and get you to KEEP listening to drag you through spot sets (commercials). If the DJ says “coming up after the break, we’ve got Blood on the Dance Floor”, you’re going to say “who? I’m not listening through 3 minutes of commercials for that!” and you’re going to change the channel. SO… if I put them on my list, first of all I went out of my way to listen to them (breaking another rule of my own about the list, I only include songs I heard organically, either through work, while at the gym, on the radio, or though other “offline” means), and second, I’m now bullying some nobody.

 

Any song by Lady Gaga

People love to hate Lady Gaga, and maybe this would have been her year to appear on the list… if she actually put out a song. Lady Gaga did not put out a song in 2012. Not one. Her most recent single was “Marry the Night”, released in November of 2011, which really didn’t do anything on the charts in 2012, so she doesn’t have a single song that qualifies. Sorry Gaga haters, you’ll have to wait until next year to see if she puts out a song stupid enough to crack the bottom 10.

 

Any song by Pitbull

I’ve seen a number of comments about how awful Pitbull is and how he should be on the list… First, Pitbull had 3 songs in 2012, so anyone that says “Pitbull should be the entire top 10!” is an idiot, so would 1 of his songs be on the list 4 times and 2 of them be on 3 times, or how would that work? Second, I just find him too generic to get worked up over. None of his songs in 2012 cracked the top 10, only two made the top 40, and only 1 of them was certified in the US (“Back in Time” went 3x platinum, most likely because of the tie-in with Men In Black III). If you don’t like Pitbull, that’s fine, like what you want to like, hate what you want to hate, but in my opinion there were 10 songs put out this year that were worse than the three Pitbull put out.

 

Any song that I can’t find anything funny to say about

Again, keep in mind this is all for the sake of comedy, and there’s a reason why I’m now known as the guy who does this… search “Worst Songs of 2011” on YouTube. My video has nearly 3 million views, everyone else ranges from 300 views to 40,000 views. Not to sound arrogant, but you’re not listening to this and sharing it with people because of the songs themselves, it’s what I say about them. If the list was me saying “#10 – [Insert song here] This song sucks because it’s repetitive and boring and it’s stupid… #9 – [Insert song here] I hate this song, it sucks and is annoying… #8 – [Insert song here] I didn’t like this song, it was stupid”… I’d have no fan base. You want to be entertained, and that’s not entertaining. Don’t take this list super serious, don’t say things like “Oh, this should be #4, not #6” or “why isn’t [insert your least favourite song] on the list instead of [insert some song you didn’t think was all that bad]”, just enjoy the comedy. Or don’t. Whatever.

Setting Up Your Own Recording Station At Home

I think younger broadcasters starting out in the industry get the impression that it’s expensive and difficult to record broadcast-quality vocals at home. It’s not exactly pocket change, and it’s not as simple as plugging a USB or little headset mic in to use Skype (well, it can be but it’s not the best solution), but people I’ve talked to over the last year or so who are getting started in the business seem to feel that it’s not at all within their reach. Well… it is, if you can scrape together $300 or so. This article will outline a few ways you can get started, along with some technical information and some issues I’ve run into that might act as helpful lessons while you’re attempting to set things up.

WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THIS?!:

I don’t know… you’re the one that clicked to read this. Think of it as an investment though. Say you’re in the radio biz right now, and you get canned tomorrow, but you need to update your demo to find a new job (or you’d like to create a custom demo for a potential new employer). Where do you plan on recording that? Chances are your old boss isn’t going to let you come in and play in the production studio. I’m going to warn you in advance though, if you’re hoping this will guide you towards picking up enough equipment to start your own voice over business… it might get you started, but you’re probably going to need to spend a lot more. This is great though for higher quality podcasting, doing some home musical recording, or maybe even making smarmy YouTube videos (*cough*), but it’s missing the processing and some other high end equipment that your competition would already have.

WARNINGS:

I have a background working with computers (my first job was working as a repair tech, I still provide help desk services for my current employer from time to time, and I have a diploma in Computer Programming, even though I couldn’t create a “Hello World” program in C++ to save my life anymore), so things that were headaches for me may end up as migraines for you. I also don’t practically have time to troubleshoot issues for everyone, and I’m also not an expert on this. If you have a question, please feel free to comment/send me an e-mail (dose@adam-buckley.com) but I may or may not be able to respond to each one (others may be able to though).

Also, most of the prices I quote are from the PA Shop, a place I’ve dealt with very reliably from my first mic and firewire pre-amp to all my latest components. This is not a commercial for them, I don’t care where you buy your stuff from, but I’ll say I’ve never had any problems with them, so I have no problem recommending them.

THINGS YOU SHOULD HAVE BEFOREHAND:

Recording Software

Some pre-amps and mixers come with something, but some people I know like Audacity [http://audacity.sourceforge.net/] because it’s free and has a lot of functionality of more expensive recording and editing software. I personally use an old copy of Cool Edit Pro, because of how similar it is to Adobe, and how easily it detects a device that it can record from. I don’t know a lot about Audacity, only that a lot of people seem to make it work for themselves, so if you’re having trouble with that, I’m sure there are a number of tutorials written by the Audacity community that can help you.

A Quiet Area

I don’t know a thing about sound proofing, you might be able to find other articles written on that, but I will say it’s expensive. We’re just talking about something to get you up and running, if you want to start your own voice-over/narration business, the information here probably isn’t quite going to get you where you need to be for that. However, don’t be angry when you decide to use this as a guide to purchasing some items, then get mad when all your recordings have your neighbour’s music or screaming kids in it.

A Somewhat Decent Computer

You WILL have problems if you’re just going to try this with a $250 Netbook or low end laptop. You’ve been warned. Same goes for if you try to hook it up to your 5 year old PC. Also, is your computer’s fan really loud? If so, your mic is going to pick that up. The chain is only as strong as its weakest link, always keep that in mind.

Patience

Depending on your level of computer knowledge and technical abilities, this could be a bit of a chore. You might get frustrated half way through and just take it all back. Be patient, but if you think your problems are going to be too much to overcome, or this whole project is over your head, make sure you save your receipts.

 

#1 – THE SUPER EASY, CHEAPEST SOLUTION:

A USB Microphone (All in: Roughly $150 plus tax)

Things you’ll need:

A USB Microphone. Such as: Audio Technica AT2020USB (Price at PA Shop, $149.99)

http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=AT2020USB

Well, it doesn’t get any easier or cheaper than this. It’s an entry level broadcast mic plugged into USB. You could buy a cheaper one if you want (See: the “Blue” series which you can pick up for around $100) or even a more expensive one (See: The Rode Podcaster, about $250 but my experience with it’s big brother, the Rode Procaster, was not a good one, so I could not recommend that without actually laying hands on one and I’m not about to spend $250 to find out), it’s not going to beat the sound you’ll get out of the other solutions I’ll discuss here, in fact it defeats the whole purpose of me even writing this (other than to tell you that you can record vocals in your house for $150), you could have typed “USB Microphone” into Google and you didn’t even need my help, but… here we are.

POTENTIAL ISSUES:

Control:

I have no idea what the driver of this is like, maybe it has some decent level controls… but if it doesn’t, you’re pretty well stuck at the mercy of whatever it gives you. There’s no controls on the mic itself, and the little research I’ve done doesn’t mention it coming with any such software.

Compatibility:

This mic may physically last for a while, but if the company doesn’t update drivers for it when a new Operating System comes out, you’re SOL. Also, no clue if it works on Macs (I actually have no clue if any of these solutions work on Macs by the way, I’ve been using PCs for 20 years and don’t have any interest in switching now, and I’m not going to buy hardware that’s upwards of 3 times the cost of the PC equivalent just because it’s shiny and well marketed).

Scalability:

It’s just a mic. I guess you could technically buy as many of them as you have USB ports, but there are no other inputs for an instrument or anything like that. Still, if all you want to do is record your voice with as few problems as possible, and you don’t think you’re tech savvy enough to attempt the more difficult solutions, this is probably the way to go.

 

#2 – THE EASY SOLUTION:

A Microphone & USB or Firewire Interface (All in: Roughly $285 plus tax to start)

Things you’ll need:

A Microphone. Recommended: Audio Technica AT2020 (Price at PA Shop, $107.23)
http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=AT2020

A USB or Firewire Interface, Such As: Focusrite Scarlett 2i2 Portable USB Recording Interface (Price at PA Shop, $149.99)

http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=Scarlett%202i2

An XLR cable (length will vary depending on your needs, Price At PA Shop, anywhere from $10 – $50, link below is a 6 foot cable for just under $10)
http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=HXX-6

A Mic Stand. A simple desk stand will do for what you’re doing (Price at PA Shop, $16.49)
http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=MS-105

I’m not officially recommending the Focusrite USB interface as I’ve never used it, but on paper it has what you need: A pre-amp with phantom power that plugs directly into USB, and some software to record into. I can however recommend the AT2020 as a great starter mic. It’s the same mic my college radio station used, it sounds well above what you might expect for under $110 (seriously, $110 for a broadcast-quality condenser mic… it’s fantastic). You could skimp a little more and pick up one of the Behringer C-series mics for $60 or $70 but I’m not about to recommend them.

This couldn’t get any easier. Install and connect the USB or Firewire Interface of your choosing, connect the microphone via XLR cable, set up your favourite software to record, and play with the knobs (or on some USB/Firewire Interfaces, the software settings) until you get something you’re happy with.

POTENTIAL ISSUES:

Latency

Latency is, essentially, when the computer can’t keep up with the input it’s getting (“lag” for you FPS gamers). Strange things can happen to your audio with this, the most common thing I’ve run into is that it “drags” words, distorting it by recording it even just a fraction longer than it was spoken. The driver software may allow you to correct this in the settings, by increasing the latency (so if you’re computer is having trouble keeping up, bump up the latency a few milliseconds and it should solve the problem, it did with my first interface plugged into a somewhat dying laptop). Ensure your drivers are all up to date as well, and that the product is actually compatible with your operating system.

Line Noise/Mic Noise

The pre-amps on a lot of these USB or Firewire Interfaces aren’t the most quiet thing in the world… you’re paying for the convenience of not needing certain items (like a decent sound card, or expertise with more complex equipment). Couple that with a cheaper mic, and no matter how quiet your room or computer is, you’re going to have a noticable “hum” in your recording if you gain it too high, but if you gain it too low your voice will need to be amplified via software, which is going to amplify the hum anyway. This is fine if you’re just doing this as a hobby, and may not even be all that noticeable to most people, but for professional work it’s not going to quite cut it. Studio hardware like Processors, Limiters and Gates can help with this, but now you’re getting into the real money… something like that, you’re not plugging into a USB interface, if you have that kind of money you’re using a mixer. Which brings us to…

 

#3 – THE MORE DIFFICULT (but still obtainable on a budget) SOLUTION:

A Microphone, Mixer, and Sound Card (possibly optional) (All In, Roughly $280 to start, much more expensive if you want it to be).

Things you’ll need:

A Microphone. Recommended: Audio Technica AT2020 (Price at PA Shop, $107.23)
http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=AT2020

A Mixer. Recommended: Mackie 402-VLZ3 (Price at Long & McQuade, $99.00)

http://www.long-mcquade.com/products/6679/Pro_Audio_Recording/Mixers/Mackie/402-VLZ3_-_4_Channel_Compact_Mixer.htm

MAYBE OPTIONAL: A Sound Card (I’ll explain why this MAY be optional). Soundblaster Audigy SE (Price at TigerDirect.ca, $34.99)
http://www.tigerdirect.ca/applications/SearchTools/item-details.asp?EdpNo=4459743&Sku=C44-3400

An XLR cable (length will vary depending on your needs, Price At PA Shop, anywhere from $10 – $50, link below is a 6 foot cable for just under $10)
http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=HXX-6

A Dual 1/4” to single 1/8” cable (length will vary depending on your needs, Price at PA Shop for a 15 foot cable, $14.00)

A Mic Stand. A simple desk stand will do for what you’re doing (Price at PA Shop, $16.49)
http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=MS-105

That’s right… a Mackie Mixer for $99 (one of, if not the best brand of mixer, and not because of hype or advertising, they’re built to last and sound great). It’s only 4 channels, but we only need 1 anyway (this is a little more scalable if you want to add a 2^nd mic, maybe add an instrument, etc). This is my current setup.

Plug the Mic into the XLR, Plug your 1/4” cables into the Main Outs, plug the other end of that cable into your line in/mic in port on your sound card or motherboard (SEE POTENTIAL ISSUES BELOW), and now you’re starting to put something pretty professional sounding together… here’s a sample of me speaking into a Rode NT1-A (retails around $260 for the mic, but it comes with a shock mount and pop filter so that’s handy).

Voice Test

That’s quality at an affordable price 🙂

So, you’re probably asking yourself “why wouldn’t I just do this, it’s almost the same price as the simpler way, I’m not really saving any money, and if I don’t need a sound card it’s actually cheaper, AND it sounds better than using that other junk!”

Here’s why:

POTENTIAL ISSUES:

Noisy Line In Port On Main Board:

Your motherboard might not have this problem… mine did. No matter what you plugged into it, it would record/output a high pitched whine. I don’t care how good you think you are as a producer, you’re not getting that out without severely ruining your recording. Easiest way to test to see if you have this problem is… plug anything into that port. Could be an MP3 player (using a 1/8” male to 1/8” male cable, plug one end into the MP3 player’s headphone jack, the other end into the mic port on your computer). Turn the MP3 player on, and record into your favourite software, making sure your levels are ok. Now, pause the music… does it still appear to be recording (your levels will still be hovering, and probably inconsistent)? If so, stop the recording and listen back to it, carefully. Notice that whiny humming? That’s interference because a) motherboard makers are cheap and don’t work too hard on that, they’re not meant for high quality audio recordings, and b) the motherboard also has so many other things it’s doing, it’s a wonder that noise isn’t worse. A dedicated sound card will get rid of that, however…

Sound Card Driver Issues:

What a nightmare it was installing my Soundblaster card. After installing it using the drivers that came with it, I was having what I believed to be the same latency issues as I’d had a few years back with my original starter setup (words being dragged and just weird sounds overall every 20-30 seconds, but this makes no sense considering I’m using a PC I custom built a year ago with some excellent specs, and had no problems with my Firewire interface). So, I updated the drivers, which eliminated that issue, but now everything sounded overly compressed, despite the settings claiming I was recording at a decent quality (16bit, 48000 Hz). Of course, when I installed the updated drivers, it also installed a boatload of other Creative Labs software. So, I uninstalled everything, reinstalled just the most up to date driver this time, and it was all good. Problem was, this took at least an hour and a half of my day to get sorted out. Oh, also you need to know how to physically install parts in your computer. If you don’t know how to do that, and your on-board mic port sounds like garbage, you’re pretty well screwed for this option.

Requires A Little More Knowledge Overall:

The first setup listed in this article is literally just plugging one cable in and then talking into a mic. The second setup is pretty easy too; there’s a couple knobs on the USB/Firewire Interface that are fairly self explanatory (“gain” means “louder” essentially, though don’t ever say this to my college Production teacher, he will cause you great pain). The Mackie mixer really isn’t that complex, in fact this model is about as easy as mixers get… but there’s a few more dials and knobs you need to be aware of. You’ve got your channel’s gain, you’ve got your channel’s level control, as well as some control over the high and low ends (some basic EQ/processing which can bring out your voice nicely), and then the Main Mix control. However, you don’t need to be that intimidated… just set everything to Unity (“12 O’Clock” most of the time, or so the line is pointing at the “U”) and then figure out levels from there.

If none of that deters you, and you’re willing to really give it a shot… I really recommend doing it this way. For less than $300, you’ve got something that’s going to last you years (Mackie mixers are notoriously durable, and if you take good care of your mic it’ll last as long as you need it to, I just recently sold my first AT2020, had it for over 3 years and there were no issues with it at all, I bet it’ll last another 7 easily), and could help you out with your career down the road, or make you a few bucks on the side (maybe you know a local group that could use your talents for a modest fee, or if you have a quiet enough room this may suffice for getting you started in the VO biz, or doing voice tracking for stations if you have some connections).

 

POSSIBLE FAQs

Q: I’ve got everything plugged into my mic port, all my levels look good and I’m seeing levels through the board, but nothing’s recording. What’s wrong with my equipment?!

A: Check to make sure your mic port is a) set to be the default recording device, and b) the “volume” (what a terrible word to use for a mic port) is up. This is generally done in the “Sounds” area of Control Panel in Windows.

Q: I see some mic cables are more expensive than others for the same length. Does it really matter if I buy a more expensive one?

A: To quote Reverend Lovejoy, “Short Answer ‘Yes’ with an ‘If’, long answer ‘No’… with a ‘but’”. Depends on what you’re going to be doing with them. The cables will degrade quicker than the rest of your stuff… are you planning on moving it around a lot? Unplugging it and plugging it back in? If No, the cheaper cables should do just fine. If you’re planning on using this as part of a PA system or for doing live remotes, you might want to consider the more expensive cables (Solution #3 will work for that, plug the main outs from the Mackie into a venue’s sound system instead of a computer, use the line-ins for a computer or something that plays music, and you’ve got a little mobile PA setup that could be used for sporting events, small event DJing, etc).

Q: I’m popping letters like P’s and T’s like crazy, is there anything I can do about this?

A: Sometimes mic technique is just not going to help (especially with a cheaper microphone where your recording is too low if you’re too far away from it). Consider getting a pop filter… I however do NOT recommend the RODE Pop Shield. It’s like $60 – $80, and though theoretically it should do a fantastic job (it’s big and metal and looks bad ass), it doesn’t. I felt like I was better off not having anything on the mic, since it also kind of blocks your vision (making script reading more difficult when the mic is on the same desk as your monitors). Just get one of the round fabric ones, like this: http://www.pashop.com/site/php/products/productPage.php?name=MWS-56DLX. Always remember to try and keep your face about 4 to 6 inches from the mic and just a touch off-axis (not speaking directly into the middle of it) and that should help too. And of course, you can always edit them out (but that’s another tutorial for another day).

The Ten Worst Songs of 2011

My annual list of the Ten Worst Songs of 2011 is up. Nothing more needs to be said… just watch.

The Ten Worst Songs of 2011: What NOT to Expect

Alright, so my Ten Worst Songs of 2011 video will be posted probably within the next 14 days. And once it’s up, I expect to hear a lot of “Why isn’t ____________ on it!?”. Well, I can’t please everyone, but keep in mind why I feel my opinion on this subject matters: I work with music every day. I’m not someone who THINKS they’re an expert when it comes to mainstream music… I AM an expert when it comes to mainstream music. It’s my full time job. The songs I’ve put on the list are songs I’ve heard dozens, well over a hundred times, it’s not just some song I heard and said “that’s annoying, it’s going on the list”. That said, sorry if your least favourite song doesn’t make the video, but I think you’ll be happy with the end result. In the meantime, here’s a preview of what NOT to expect:

REBECCA BLACK:

I’ve already stated this once in video form, and countless times in comments… I do not recognize Rebecca Black as a legitimate artist. She is an internet sensation, and to add her opens the floodgates. The Ten Worst Songs of every year moving forward would just be a bunch of shitty viral videos… some little girl with rich parents who paid to make a shitty video, some guy who can’t rap but thinks he can, a dipshit screamo band, etc… that’s useless, there’s nothing funny or enjoyable about that video. My video should be titled “The Ten Worst Songs of 2011 Performed by Artists Who Actually Have Charted On Billboard And Have Record Contracts” but that title is too long. So, no viral Internet sensations will make the list.

 

LMFAO:

In a “Musical Autopsy” video I made about LMFAO, I said that LMFAO can’t be held to the same standards as other artists, because they’re not meant to be heard on the radio, they’re not top 40 artists, they’re club artists. If I include LMFAO, I should include every other club artist, which means that “We No Speak Americano” song by Yolanda Be Cool should make a list, because it’s pretty dumb, “Barbra Streisand” by Duck Sauce should make the list… and again, the list just becomes a list of stupid club songs. If you want to hear me make fun of LMFAO, go watch that video linked above, but they won’t make the list.

 

ANY SONG I ALREADY DID A MUSICAL AUTOPSY OF:

I’ve been pretty careful not to show my hand this year. Though I did Musical Autopsies this year of Katy Perry’s “Last Friday Night” and Bruno Mars’ “Grenade“, and I do consider them to be awful songs, they didn’t make the Ten Worst of the Year. Consider them somewhere in the top 20.

LADY GAGA:

Lady Gaga is too generic for me to add to these lists (which sounds funny because she’s fucking weird and not really generic at all in terms of her personality or style). Maybe eventually she’ll make a list, she’s got the potential when she breaks out nonsense lyrics like she did in “Just Dance” (which probably WOULD have made a list of mine had I done one in 2008) or the start of “Bad Romance”, but to be honest, she doesn’t spark any real emotion in me either way, positive or negative.

ROCK:

The “your a raciss!” crowd complained that last year’s list was all rap (it wasn’t) and all black artists (it wasn’t). This year’s list gets a little more diverse actually, and includes a “rock” song (more of a pop rock song but it’s a band that plays actual instruments, in fact two “bands” appear on the list this year). It also includes country, pop, and yes… hip hop and rap. That’s what’s popular these days. If rock music was more popular, there would be a much better chance of more rock appearing on these lists, but it’s not. I think Coldplay sucks… that make you happy? And if I put a Nickelback song on the list, I’d just get accused of being lazy since it’s just too hip to hate Nickelback (and they’re another band who really just sparks no emotion in me either way, which is actually the worst thing you can do as an artist… you want people to love you or hate you. If people are just apathetic towards you, that’s the worst).

I think it’s safe to assume the video will be up no later than the 19th. In the meantime, go back and watch last year’s video again, or enjoy the last two years of my material at my YouTube Channel and my Website (the latter includes a lot more of my early work, and mp3s you can download so you can take my voice with you on road trips, bus rides, or to the gym… might be weird to work out to me ranting but who knows, it might be motivating?).

A Dose of Buckley #59 – Facebook Changes

This week, Facebook made some changes to their layout, and like every time Facebook makes a change, major, minor, or somewhere in between, people immediately cry and ask for it to be changed back, and make ridiculous threats like “I’m quitting, they’ll lose so much money!”. Sorry… WHAT money will they lose? And you do realize how little Facebook means in the grand scheme of things right? Buckley takes on the crybabies in this week’s Dose of Buckley.

A Dose of Buckley #57 – September 11 (10th Anniversary)

10 Years ago today (unless you watch this on a different day), the World Trade Center was attacked… and while so many specials and newspapers and other things will go on to talk about what a horrific day it was in history (and it was, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying it wasn’t), if you take a truly rational look at it… what impact has it REALLY had on every other human in the WORLD? How is YOUR life different? And do you really care? Be absolutely honest with yourself, how often do you really think about not just the event itself, but the people who lost their lives, and their families? How does that effect your ability to watch Modern Family on your 52″ TV while stuffing back a bag of Doritos?

It’s the most polarizing Dose of Buckley to date, and can be seen/heard below:

A Dose of Buckley #54 – Music vs the Internet

Sure, the internet has made it easier than ever for musicians to share their talents… but what happens when the “musicians” don’t actually have “talent”? Has the invention of YouTube made it too easy for no-talent hacks to make a few bucks? How else would “Lady” be even partially known? And how hypocritical do I sound? These questions and more, answered with this edition of “A Dose of Buckley”:

More angry humour from an angry man at A Dose of Buckley

A Dose of Buckley #53 – Rap-Dances

What can I say, maybe I’m getting soft in my old-age, as I approach the big 3-0 mark, but once in a while I do a rant for the fans. Not to say I don’t hate rap-dances, I absolutely do, but there are other topics I’d probably like to talk about first… however, the small cult following I’ve gained over the last little while has been wanting me to talk about some of these songs and the absolutely ridiculous dances that go along with them for some time, so consider this a nice gesture for the fans who’ve patiently waited as I’ve talked about Canadian Politics, the Canadian Postal service, Mark Zuckerberg, etc… all along wondering “when the hell is he going to just make fun of music again, we only subscribed because of your list of worst songs of 2010, that’s what we want to hear more about!” So here… don’t say I never did anything for you. Click the video below and enjoy.

Advice No One Asked For – Number Eight

What other websites are really updating on the long weekend? NONE OF THEM! That’s who! Buckley however doesn’t really observe July 4th (seeing as I’m a Canadian and all), so I figured why not give my American fans something to do besides get drunk and shoot roman candles at each other (you can do that later tonight).

This week at A Dose of Buckley, it’s the 8th installment of “Advice No One Asked For”. I try and help a woman choose sides in an issue that I didn’t even know still existed past 1972.

Hey, you know there’s a whole website full of this stuff, right? Check it out at A Dose of Buckley

A Dose of Buckley #52 – Buckley vs Women

If you can believe this, some people think I have a problem with women… I know, crazy right?! Well, though I make some comments that are all in good fun in my videos and on this website, anyone who actually knows me will tell you that I’m one of the classiest sons of bitches you’ll ever meet, but being nice to women isn’t funny… who ever heard a joke that starts with “so, I went and got flowers for a girl the other day” and ends with “and she enjoyed them so much that she put them in a vase right away”, and thought it was funny? No one, that’s who.

Anyway, what issues I may have with the so-called “fairer sex” could possibly be narrowed down to the behaviour of some females that I do not approve of. And since Buckley’s recently single and even more bitter than ever before, here’s a video about why some girls piss me off.